A Godsend day……….

For various reasons, I’ve been in a fairly ‘black’ mood lately.  Alot of things piling up on me, or seeming too, anyway.  And of course, even the smallest thing would seem to just add to my real and perceived burden. 
 
But……..
 
Last saturday I was invited by a friend to come out to Llano and attend a ‘concert’ being performed by some friends of hers who have a Christian band.  I also was going to do some work on her computer, so it seemed like a good arrangement.
 
Since my tire blew out on me the previous weekend, I still hadn’t been able to replaced the tire until I got paid by a client for some consulting work.  Not only did I need to replace the blown tire, but my two front tires are very close to needing replacing too.  So, I was literally driving to Llano purely on faith! 
 
It’s kind of funny.  After a while, you just stop worrying and figure whatever happens happens.  Needless to say, I made it out there.  Once in Llano, I had to stop in to a little antique store to get directions to the venue.  When I got there, it was the wrong place.  Fortunately, I got in touch with my friend and she directed me to the park where the band was performing.  I got there just as she and her mom were unpacking their car.  I was mmediately greeted by her mom, whom, if I had ever met, it would have been close to 40 years ago!
 
Well the band was really good.  This was less of a concert, and more of a glorified (no pun intended, ok maybe it is) rehearsal.  Most of the songs were well done and a few of them were obviously being ‘worked’ on.  The pavillion is right on the Llano greenbelt.  Maybe 100 yards from the river.  It was a warm, sunny day.  We setup our camping chairs in what shade we could find.  I joked about how we all looked like cows in a sunny pasture.  Everyone grouped under the nearest tree to setup!  Too funny.
 
While the band played, people visited, listened, watched their children, etc.  All the family activities you like to see.  My friend brought her big, ole, freindly dog Zeus.  I shared Zeus sitting duties.  Which were considerable since he was determined to lay down on some other peoples blanket!  Then when his ‘fetch toy’ was brought out……..oh man!  Talk about a one track mind!  LOL
 
 
Well I guess I mentioned all that, to say this………….
 
I got to know and love the country life when I was married to Kathleen.  Her family was from Cheapside, Texas (west of Cuero / Gonzales) and we spent alot of time down there on their ranches.  Country people just have that quality about them that appeals to me. Well, Llano has that same feel. 
 
The small Texas town.  Friendly people.  Everyone knows everyone.  God, Family & Friends.  People that give you the ‘2 finger off the steering wheel’ wave as you approach and pass each other on the road.  People that pull over for a funeral procession.  That will wave ‘thank you’ if you give them room to pass on the narrow country roads.
 
After the concert, we went back to my friends parents house.  They have a 50 acre place just east of Llano.  Driving up to the house, my mind was taken back to the days down on the ranch at Cheapside.  The cattle guards.  The gravel road.  The tanks.  The brush.  The entire experience.  Even how I felt comfortable leaving my windows down, and the keys in the car. 
 
Her mom had left the concert a little early, and on her way home stopped and got some brisket from the local BBQ place.  Then while we were working on the computer, she was making the fixings for dinner.  I wasn’t expecting to be invited, but hey, these are nice people.  I can’t remember the last time I was part of a family dinner that wasn’t a holiday event.  What great memories that evokes.  That was a passion of my father’s.  Having family meal time.
 
The conversation was so relaxing and pleasant.  Her dad is a huge UT fan and shared some of the UT paraphernalia he has collected and received over the years. 
 
It was apparent later that night that we needed to have internet access in order to complete installing a software package.  They have only dialup access at their house, and that was not available, so…..we went to their church where they have wireless.  Her dad, she and I convoyed to town, which was great since getting from their home to the highway was akin to getting out of a house of mirrors, especially if this was your first time there and it’s night!
 
While driving out, I was fixated on the sky.  Pitch black with a zillion stars.  I found Aquarius, of course!  I hadn’t seen a sky like that since I was in Baghdad.  You can NEVER convince me this was all a cosmic accident.
 
Once at the church, we got the computer setup and started the download.  It was going to take a while, so we went in to the sanctuary where I was shown the alter and crosses that my friends dad had built himself.  Very impressive.
 
Impressive is the word I’ll use to describe the entire day.  And God send.  Because that’s exactly what it was.  To me, this is how it should be.  Every now and then, I need to be reminded that the world is NOT only the hustle, bustle, ‘get out of my way’ life we live here in the city. 
 
All my batteries were recharged that day.  A quality day, a blessed day, with quality people.  And I know exactly why I was directed there, and by whom.

Fun Time with “Joyce” (27Mar09)

- 27 Mar 09 -

Letter (email) to “Joyce”’s sister:

I have to start this by telling you that I care about your sister very much. So much that I made compromises that I normally wouldn’t. And I made allowances for her that I shouldn’t just to make her happy or comfortable. In trying to make things easier for “Joyce”, (I’ll be honest) and for me too, I probably gave her more slack than I should have. As you know, we only have so much control over her. She has a way of making things happen for herself and getting what she wants. And what she apparently wants is to get drunk and party.

My first step in stopping to ‘enable’ “Joyce” was when I told her she had to be out of my house by Feb 1st, when she came to stay with you. I sincerely felt that being that close to her kids would make a huge impact on her behaviour. Unfortunately, I’m a romantic. I couldn’t shake the memory of her and how she cared for her kids when I first met her. I hoped that she would feel a little of that by living so close to them again. Especially Stephanie and A.J.

When “Joyce” moved up to stay with you I felt my withdrawals. I missed her, even though she seldom stayed at my house other than to come wash clothes, or shower, etc. But I gradually transitioned back in to my ‘normal’ life. A normal routine. I wasn’t faced with the day to day worries and stresses wondering where she was, who she was hanging out with, and if she was ok or not.

I don’t know how to be delicate about this next point, but, these last 2 weeks, working out at the rodeo (my 20th year with the same group people) has been a God-send. These are the finest of the finest people. Family oriented, true friends. It has nothing to do with money or social status or anything like that. It’s more of being around people that have their sh*t together.

Last night was not a good night. I had told “Joyce” NOT to come to my house again if she was drinking or drunk. I wasn’t going to put up with it. Well, about 10pm I hear the downstairs front door open. And I hear “Joyce” talking to herself. She’s taking too long to come up, so I know she’s drinking. And yep, she’s buzzed pretty good.

I reminded her that she was no longer welcome at my house if she was drunk. She did all the “Joyce” excuses, but for once I decided to stick to my guns. She tried to stall by going to the bathroom and as it turns out was drinking a beer in there. She start yelling at me about ‘living a day in her life’. About how she was the victim, etc. etc. I wasn’t going to argue with her in her state. But she’s got to learn that she made all the decisions that put her in her predicament. Everyone has choices to make, and those choices determine where we end up in life. Dammit!!!

Anyway, one thing led to a dozen but I still insisted she go back to her ‘friends’. I gave her her suitcase and purse and eventually took her downstairs. She sat at the bottom of my stairs finishing the beer she snuck in in her jacket.

Then I heard her making too much noise. I have neighbors that are trying to sleep. I went down and tried to quiet her and I’m sure you know how well that worked. She had thrown some of her beer on my floor and wall down there and that was it for me. I put her outside. She tried to grab whatever she could and to keep from being put out, but I eventually got her outside and locked the door.

The next 45 minutes to an hour was very difficult. She spent it banging on my doors. Both front and back. She knocked over my bbq grill and generally made lots of noise. I’m sure my neighbor must have come out and threatened to call the police. She eventually stopped, and I’m praying she went back to her ‘friends’.

Raquel, I’m torn up about this, but I have to put a stop to it. I do care about “Joyce” and want her to get well and for her and Geno to have a successful life together. I pray that she can hang in there until he gets out of prison. And I pray that he still loves her and stays with her and gives her the help she needs.

I may have ended “Joyce”’s and my relationship last night. I hope not. But I may have. Only time will tell. Maybe you can explain to “Joyce” that I had to do what I did.

Sincerely,

Eric

Misc – Friends & Choices

Thank God for the rodeo! Not because it’s 2 weeks of running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Nor because it’s an opportunity to make some extra cash. But because it’s the 2 weeks out of each year that I get to spend time with quality people that I’ve been fortunate enough to get to know throughout the years that I’ve been either volunteering or working out there.

Especially lately, that I’ve been closely involved in a situation that frequently involves persons and personalities that are dynamically opposite from those I normally associate. I remember once I was told by someone that she wouldn’t consider being anything more than a friend, because she didn’t fit in with the people that I associated with, and that she would feel uncomfortable and out of place. Of course, I couldn’t say she was right. I didn’t want to even think she was right. But she was. Don’t get me wrong. Although I’d do many things differently (20/20 hindsight), I’d still do everything I could to try to help her out of her current predicament.

I’ve alway prided myself on being able to choose people to be friends & relationships. And between the past 6 months and now, I’ve come to appreciate them all the more. I’m not writing this to degradate anyone, but to honor my friends. I’ve seen first hand how decisions we make long ago affect our lives more than can be imagined. It’s the difference between being able to choose what school you want your children to attend, and living day to day, hoping that your stuff isn’t stolen by the strangers crashed at the room where you’re stuck ‘crashing’ yourself.

I’m not selling you a ticket, ma’am.

As you may or may not know, I work in Ticket Sales for the Star of Texas (Austin) Fair & Rodeo. Well, last night (Monday) at the rodeo a woman came up to my window about 30 minutes before the concert was to begin. She looked like she hadn’t had a decent meal for a while. By her skin condition, she obviously spends most of her time outside. She could not speak very well and was slurring her speech. She also was not too steady on her feet. She wanted a ticket to the Josh Turner concert.

There was no way I was selling her a ticket. To me, she was just too drunk. The arena is tricky enough to navigate through a large crowd as it is, much less in the incapacitated state she was in. So I told her I wasn’t going to sell her a ticket and if she wanted she could go to the ticket manager at the north ticket office to plead her case to him. After 5 minutes of playing the victim, she finally left my window.

A few minutes later she shows up with a Sheriff’s Deputy who tells me that she is not drunk, but is mentally handicapped, and to sell her the ticket. I reluctantly did as he ordered. While I’m in the process of getting her her ticket, the deputy begins to question the woman. One thing leads to a dozen, and by the way the woman was responding (or NOT responding) he comes to the conclusion that…………………ready?……………………she’s drunk!

Don’t get me wrong. He was very professional and very polite to her. He explained to me that they (the police) had been in some trouble the last couple of years because they did indeed suspect some mentally handicapped people to be drunk and treated them as such only to be repremanded later. So he was giving her the benefit of the doubt.

If any of you have read what postings I have in my blog, you should know that one thing I now know all too well is identifying and dealing with intoxicated persons!!!

Just another night at the Rodeo!!!

Later,

Eric

Save Reagan HS “political ad”

Aparrently BHO’s Media team is involved now! (or so it would seem)

 

Gee, funny, they didn’t mention the fights, the drugs, the police calls, the murder, the assaults.  Nor did they mention the years of failing tests which is why the TEA is keeping an eye on them. 

 

I went to the LBJ / Reagan football game last October.  What the Reagan Band did was vulgar and disgusting. 

 

In short…………………This is NOT the Reagan High School that we knew.  It is NOT the Reagan High School that won championships in football, baseball, track, or, that fielded an award winning marching band of over 300 members.  The list can go on.

 

So watch this political video produced by the Save Reagan group.

http://vimeo.com/3148622

–
_________________________
Eric Robertson
epr0210@yahoo.com
www.corsairphoto.com

Optimism abounds!

Optimism abounds!

12Feb2009

Two Saturdays ago “Joyce” and I went to breakfast while we waited for her mom to come and pick her up. It was moving day. Joyce was going back to Ft. Worth to stay with her sister and be near 3 of her children. A month earlier I had given Joyce till the end of January to find some other place to ’stay’. Why the quotes? Because she seldom stayed at my place. Oh her things were there, but I felt more like I was providing storage. Anyway…….

“Joyce” had fallen in to a pattern of perpetual small failures that snowballed in to her being more and more frustrated every day. She would get up early and go to the day labor / temp employment agencies looking for work for the day only to be sent home. This frustrated me to no end! I tried to convince her that getting a regular job would be a better route, but she would have none of that. So every morning off she went, and in over 2 months, she was assigned work 2 or 3 times.

Now the main problem with this is that once she was informed there was no work for her that day, she would find her nearest drinking buddies, and that was all it took for her to end up wasted, which lead to her passing out somewhere. Several times I was called to come pick her up by people I’d never heard of, in different places around the area. I can only compare her various ‘drinking hang outs’ to a squirrel that burries his nuts various places in the yard so that he’s never far from food.

Again, I can not, and will not ever, understand how people can call themselves friends that will knowingly provide so much beer or whatever, to someone they KNOW is a chronic alcoholic, to the point of them being so drunk they pass out!!! I’ll never get it, I guess.

Back to the present………..

Since her return to Ft. Worth she and I have spoken almost everyday. And everyday she has usually been either sober or having had just a few beers. This has been a fantastic turn around. Her being with her sister, and near her children have been fantastic. No, I’m not saying she’s ‘recovered’. Of course not. But the propensity for her to improve, and reach her goals are so much greater in this situation than they ever could have been had she stayed in Austin.

It was so frustrating for me. I have several ‘friends’ that wonder what the hell I’m doing trying to help “Joyce”. I even had one supposed friend that actually said to me that I should just let her go and if she dies she dies. And this ‘friend’ considers themself a devout christian! (But that’s a whole different blog) You see, I know ‘Joyce’. I know how smart she is. I know how much love she has for her children and family. I know how much potential she has. Which all comes down to I know what a terrible waste it would be to, “….just let her die…”

So I now have a renewed optimism for “Joyce”. And I pray to God that her progress is continual and solid and permanent.

The Spring Battle of Ungawa 07

With the upcoming Fall Ungawa fast approaching, I’m reposting my recounting of the Spring Ungawa from www.ungawa.com

 

Subject:   Another Ungawa complete!
Name:   Eric
Date Posted:   Mar 31, 08 – 10:04 AM
Email:   epr0210@yahoo.com
Message:   Well another Ungawa complete! Congratulations to all that not only made it out there, but returned safely home.

I had planned on getting to the site early Friday morning, but I got caught at home having to complete some work on a new project. So I didn’t arrive at the campsite until 2pm on Saturday.

When I arrived, I came upon the site of an obvious battle that had been waged the day before (Friday). As I understand it, the battle began early in the morning and raged on throughout the night. As I approached the battle field I could see the survivors scattered about the camp, walking slowly, talking sporadically, and avoiding direct sunlight.

The scene was one reminisant of artist renditions of the Texas Revolutionary Army bivouacs. Various methods of hootches strewn about the grounds, under and in between the trees. Only these hootches ranged from mats on the ground to luxurious RV trailers. Watercraft of all kinds from kayaks to power boats were on the shore. Some which never touched water except for the rain on Saturday night!

As the day wore on the walking wounded seemed to regain their strength. Movement seemed to quicken some, but not nearly to the pace of what must have been required to fend off the enemy from the previous days fight.

Speaking of the ‘enemy’, their carcasses were evident all over the place. Most were humanely cared for and placed in their final resting place. Their uniforms indicated a coalition of many various tribes. Many of the names were familiar…..Bud Light, Miller Lite, Heinekin! There were some big guns out there also. Maker’s Mark. Glen Fidich, Seagram’s VO! Judging by the casualties they left behind, I have an all new heightened respect for these brain numbing, gut busting, insurgents!!

Hope to see all of you out there next time!!
Eric

OK, new blog is up

http://eziniraq.wordpress.com/

BOLO!

Be On the LookOut for a new blog from me.  I’m thinking about starting a new blog with some stories from my time training for and spent over in Bagdad.  They’ll mostly be short remembrances.  - E

Reconnecting

Reconnecting.  Only people that really mean something to each other can truly reconnect.  I’ve got to believe that.  It must have been 4 or maybe 6 months that I haven’t spoken to someone that always seems to find a spot in my life.  Why?  Well she really ticked me off.  To the point where I just let her go.  Was committed to not seeing, calling, talking to, or emailing her.  I must admit, this is the longest I’ve gone ‘without her’.  Well one thing led to a dozen, and I called her to see if we could help each other out.  I needed someone to do some manual labor for me, and she can always use an extra paycheck.  And when we met up, well, all seemed strangely good between us.  Go figure.  But I’m not going to test the ‘gods’ by analyzing it.  I’m just going to accept that, just like the earths climate, we run in cycles and enjoy this lastest bit of ‘good weather’.  - E